Mars, Venus & Planet Earth: What's Really Different

Everyone has a theory about men and women. It's usually built from a few vivid memories (a father who never cried, an ex who needed to "process," a best friend who swears women are impossible to read) and topped off with a few jokes that everyone seems to know. The theory feels like common sense, and it guides a lot of what you say and hear, often without your noticing.

This module holds that theory up to the light. That isn't to throw it out. Much of what people believe about the sexes points at something real. The goal is to find out which parts are real, how big they are, and where they come from, because each of those answers changes what you should do with the difference.

The short version, which you'll spend four lessons earning: men and women differ both more and less than most people think. It's less, because most measured psychological differences are small and the two sexes overlap enormously. It's more, because a handful of differences are genuinely large, and those tend to show up at the kitchen table.

The Driving Question

How different are men and women, really, and where do the differences come from?

What You'll Be Able to Do

By the end of this module you'll be able to:

• summarize Gray's Mars/Venus model, and explain why it caught on and what critics objected to;
• read a sex difference as two overlapping curves instead of two separate boxes, and translate an effect size into plain English;
• tell the handful of large differences apart from the many small ones;
• weigh biological, evolutionary and social explanations fairly, including in areas where scientists still disagree;
• explain why emotion differs more in how it's shown than in how it's felt, and what that means when someone you love goes quiet.

Time

The module takes about 2.5–2.75 hours in total. That's four lessons of 35–40 minutes each, including their exercises, plus the check-in. The Try It exercises run during your ordinary week and take minutes, not hours.